Christian parenting

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What do you fear?


What Do You FEAR?

What do you FEAR?

Face it … we all have FEARS! However, we do not come here with fear … we learn it from others and/or events.

My daughters were 10 and 14 when my brother’s plane crashed.  We all were gripped by fear of flying from that day.  Mine was debilitating to the point of being tranquilized so I could fly (a funny story for another day).  There came a point where I had to face my fear or not see my daughters.  Fear is an evil spirit you can vanquish.  My mother always said, “God is in control, on the throne, loves you and cares for you, is all-knowing … NOTHING surprises Him.”  Kinda sounds like what the Bible says doesn’t it?  Then why do we live in fear?  Why do we allow fear to cripple us?  Why do we teach our children our fear?

I will not say it is easy to get on a plane.  I had to send my oldest daughter and precious granddaughters on a plane Friday.  She has the memories of her uncle’s crash and she does not like to fly, but she does.  She always asks me to pray.  I then had to put my husband on a plane to an interview.  He needs the job … he had to fly.  I cannot and will not let satan* rob me of God’s blessings because of a spirit of fear.  I will not allow satan* to rob me of His joy in my life because of the fear of the unknown … jobless, foreclosure, what is going to happen next?

Fear is what YOU LET IT BE!  What fears are you facing today?  Do not allow satan* to lie to you?  Does he tell you that you are alone? You are NEVER alone, you have the Holy Spirit … YOU HAVE THE VICTORY!  Will your walk today be victorious or will you pass on a new set of fears to your children and those around you?  God is in control – always has been, always will be! Are you walking like He is in control of your life today or are you walking in FEAR?

Isaiah 41:10:
“Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be afraid, for I am your God. I will strengthen you; I will help you; I will hold on to you with My righteous right hand.” HCSB

Romans 8:15:
“For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” ESV

1 Corinthians 2:12:
“Now we have received not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might understand the things freely given us by God.” ESV

*satan – I know people capitalize the “S” but, I don’t.  I refuse to give him any status of importance.  He’s a snake, so satan, devil, etc. are lower case, as he is one.
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Footprints… Actions, Attitudes and Appearances


What image are leaving behind?

We have all seen signs at nature preserves and parks that read, “take nothing but photos, leave nothing but footprints”.   Would it not be wonderful if we took that mentality with us everywhere as Christians?  What ‘footprints’ do you leave each day as you hurry here and there, grumble through work or take your kids on their appointed rounds?  Who do people see as you leave?  Is it Christ?

Examples:

1) The mother that allows children to run wild in stores, destroying displays, products and endangering other shoppers by tripping them  –  Do people assume she is a Christian?

2) The road rage of cutting someone off, not allowing them in, blaring the horn or visible mouthing and hand signals – Do you think the ‘fish’ on the back of the car will send the message you are not?

3) The parent yelling, or worse ignoring their child in the store  – Do those around you see “Christ” in you?

4) The neighbor that has total disregard for others property through theirs or their children’s actions – Are your neighbors seeking Christ because of your family’s example?

5) The patron leaves a ‘tract tip’ in place of a monetary tip or along side a minimal tip – Are you portraying Christ as stingy?

6) The way you dress or dress your children for Church – Do people think you are leaving for the beach or the mall?  Are you dressed showing that you ARE blessed or do you spend more time getting ready for work, shopping, ‘dates’ and other events?  Do you present God with your best?  Not your most expensive, but you and your children are the cleanest, neatest and at your best  for church over all other places (and that includes on the inside).

We leave ‘footprints’ everywhere we go.  Sometimes we are the ONLY “Christ” people see.  Our attitudes, actions and appearance, as well as those of our children, are the footprints we leave behind.  What ‘photo image’ are they taking that will forever be emblazoned in their photo album of Christians?   Will people be glad to see you go?  Or wish you had stayed?

Ephesians 5:2

2 And walk in love, as the Messiah also loved us and gave Himself for us,  a sacrificial and fragrant offering to God.

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Sorry doesn’t cut it …


Ever said those words? I have heard it in my store, in the grocery store, today at a park … everywhere. Families interacting … the hectic pace of the holidays … the short tempers … selfishness … stubbornness … both in children and adults.  When the offender is called to task for their behavior they utter a meager ‘sorry’.  To which the other responds, “sorry doesn’t cut it”.  How many times do you hear your child say they are sorry and know they do not mean it?  How many times do you utter the word ‘sorry’ because it is expected? Worse, how many times do you tell the Lord sorry for the same repeated offense?

Children are watching.  They see you tell God you are sorry and tell others you are sorry. They watch you tell your spouse you are sorry and hopefully they hear you tell them you are sorry when you should.   How you say you are sorry is more than likely the same way they will grow up telling others they are sorry.

An apology should equal in fervency the intensity of the insult, accusation or ‘crime’.   Did you get that?  Think about what it means.  Sometimes sorry does not cut it … you need to really apologize in equal proportion to how much you hurt them.  NOT how much you think you would have been hurt in their place, but, listening carefully to them express their pain, you respond in kind with your words and actions.

However, that being said, do not hold your breath for someone to apologize.  God has to deal with some people a long time before they learn how to apologize and mean what they say.  You must learn to let go, and teach your children how to ‘let it go’.  The Bible says:

Ephesians 4:26 “don’t sin by letting anger control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry…”

We should keep short accounts and not hold grudges.  NEVER go to bed mad.  That was one of my rules when the girls were home.  No tears or pain will be remembered as deeply as the knowledge that you let someone slip away without settling accounts.  I often have said how glad I was that my middle brother and I talked early in the morning and were on good accounts when the plane crash took him away that day.

Start today with telling God how sorry you really are and do not repeat patterned prayers.  Talk to Him.  Let your children hear apologies and make sure you include an apology to them. when needed.   Always make sure you go to whom God places on your conscience through the Holy Spirit and make real apologies that fall in line with the real pain inflicted.  Keep tabs of your accounts and keep them short.


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“A Baby Changes Everything”


A Baby Changes EVERYTHING

Faith Hill sings the song “A Baby Changes Everything*”, the story of Jesus’ who came to Earth and changed the world.   If you have not seen the video or heard the song, click on the title above.

I have just returned from Montana.  God has perfect timing in our lives.  I am in retail and could only get away for a few days.  My youngest daughter was due to give birth Christmas Eve.  However, as I landed on the 10th she was already in the hospital in labor.  I was able to be there for the birth of her first child and our first grandson.  I was able to be there for my oldest at the birth of her oldest daughter, our first grandchild.  God knew my grandmother’s heart and has allowed me to be at the hospital for my daughters.

I often say that God provides minuscule pictures on earth of the ‘big picture’.  Both of my daughters lives have been changed forever by the birth of their children, as mine was with each of their births.  Nothing is the same, everything is different.  Circumstances, challenges, life … day by day a mother handles what is handed her.  What a difference a child makes.

As we come together to celebrate Christmas, let us not forget that a Baby changed everything.  Circumstances, challenges, life … day by day each of us handle what is handed to us … either WITH or withOUT the difference the CHILD of God made when He came to earth as a new-born child, to a mother who had no mother to be there for her.  What a sacrifice He made in leaving Heaven to come to a stable.  What a difference He made.

We often get frazzled by the season’s hustle and bustle, plans, and traveling.  Let us not forget that Jesus is the Reason for the Season and YOU may be the only witness that person sees that “A Baby Changes Everything”.

Will He make a difference in your CHRISTmas celebrations this year?

Have a BLESSED CHRISTMAS! ~ Renee’

*A Baby Changes Everything Warner-tamerlane Publishing Corp

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Celebrate Life (*IMHO)


Life Is Precious - Treat with Awe

We are celebrating our victorious child’s 34th birthday this week. She truly was a victory.  After five very difficult pregnancies she was born.  We first found out we were expecting her because I was being treated for bronchial pneumonia.  Due to the meds I was on that ‘could’ leave her brain-damaged, the other bad pregnancies and health risk to me and the fact Phil had lost his job, the doctor advised abortion. 

I was not new to this advice.  I received it with my second pregnancy while in the hospital during a miscarriage.  I actually lost a twin, but still had one baby.  I had lost my first child at age 24. Now at 27 I was finally expecting again. The doctor cautioned and suggested I go ahead and abort the remaining twin. After all, she had about a 10% chance of living, probably was brain-damaged and was a high risk to my health in my current condition.  I did die on the operating table with our oldest, but God had other plans.  After 10 days in the hospital I went home with a 9 pound normal and healthy baby girl.

Both of my girls are gifts from God and He knew when the doctors did not.  God IS the master physician. Neither was brain damaged, in fact just the opposite.  Both are college grads, married and are mothers.

I named our oldest Rebekah Kristen, rebirth in Christ, as both of us were given a second chance at life.  I named our youngest Victoria Paige, victorious child, as she truly was a victory against all odds.  Naming your children is very important.  Naming is important to God. God gives so many examples of why people were named what they were in the Bible.  For example:

Gen 35:10 “God said to him, ‘Your name is Jacob; You shall no longer be called Jacob, But Israel shall be your name.‘ So He called him Israel.“
Gen 5:29 “And he named him Noah, saying, ‘This one will give us comfort from our work and from the hard labor of our hands caused by the ground which the Lord has cursed.‘”

Equally important is raising them knowing WHY they were given their name.  It builds character and purpose.

When Victoria was in high school, she had to write a persuasive essay for English.  Since abortion was controversial many students wrote on that subject.  The teacher had already read them so she knew Victoria had taken the narrow path and had her present her’s last.  Her’s was the only pro-life paper. Not only did she state the facts about how it is used as birth control and that the statistics of its need for mothers at risk, rape, and incest (which are extremely rare – less than 1%); she told them about my decisions with her sister and her births.  Most of them did not know the facts and most of them were just parroting the popular voice.  Some argued we would have felt differently if she HAD been born deformed or brain-damaged.   She was able to tell them that we refused the amniocentesis test that would have shown such conditions as our resolve in accepting God’s will no matter the outcome.

So how did the world get to this state about human life?  When did we lose the awe over creation?  In my opinion it has been subtle.  I believe we as Christians are as much to blame as anyone.  We have treated motherhood as common and become flippant in our approach.  Why should the world treat life sacred and with awe when we have joined their ranks in the treatment of motherhood? 

I truly believe that if we want the public to treat an unborn baby as a baby then we need to be the first to do so.  I firmly believe that if we as Christians do not change our treatment of motherhood and birth to align with God’s word and then raise our children with the same teachings, then we can see life treated with less and less respect.

Birth is about a living soul, created by God.  God knows us from before we were born.

Jeremiah 1:5 “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”

He does not label us as a ‘pea’, a ‘kidney bean’, a ‘peanut’ or a ‘bump’.  He would never treat us so trivial.  He would not focus on the mom and her physique and draw attention away from the awe of birth.

1 Peter 3:3 “Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.”

I believe the Bible means we are not to be worldly and take on the worlds displays of dressing and that includes motherhood.  We have become flippant and tolerant of the world’s views on life.  Women are drawing attention to themselves and referring to their ‘bumps’ instead of their child given by God.  I am sadden by some Christian women who believe God’s Word yet do not follow Proverbs 31:30 and 1 Timothy 2:9-10. Motherhood has become about them instead of their testimony to God’s love and graciousness. They place photos of exposed stomachs on their social media and show off in public.

Birth is NOT a celebration about a woman’s body, but a celebration of a new life.  How sad that we have misplaced the focus and missed all these opportunities to testify to God’s wonder and miracle of birth to the masses.

So the next time you defend Pro-life and anti-abortion views, make sure your actions are not treating the unborn lives flippantly and worldly.  The world watches actions. That child is not a bump, it is a baby, a miracle created by God.  Handle with care.

*In My Humble Opinion – I know this is not going to be a popular post but, I believe that we as Christians need to check our actions against our words and views and His word.  How do we as Christians expect the world to view life with reverence if we treat it worldly ourselves?

RBGreenDesigns.com 2020