preteen

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BEatitudes = Attitudes To Be


BEatitudes:

When I was in college in Atlanta, we traveled over 30 miles on Tuesday night to a Bible study that sometimes had over 400 in attendance.  There was a three-piece band and a speaker.  Simple music, simple truths.  The concept was, “if you teach them, they will come” and we did.  We studied the Bible a passage at a time.  I remember it was the first time I heard the phrase “the Beatitudes are Attitudes to be”.  Most of what God has to teach us and our children is simple truths.  We just like to complicate them.

As parents or workers with children of various ages, we know “attitude”.  We probably get several doses a day.  Have you ever thought about teaching children a conscious attitude; attitudes to be?  Jesus did, and He gave a wonderful lesson that we should teach to our children early on.

English lesson:

BEatitudes!

TO BE verb and auxiliary verb

  • present singular 1st person: am (I am)
  • 2nd  person: are (you are)
  • 3rd person:  is (he/she is)

Attitudes are something you ARE and choose to BE.  Attitude is a decision.  Very early on you must teach children that they are choosing their attitudes and those choices decide how they act.  Their actions have consequences.   At the first sign of an inappropriate attitude you look them straight in the face and say, “you need to make a decision.  Make a good one.  If you continue in this ____ (name it – action or attitude) then YOU are DECIDING and CHOOSING this consequence“ (name it and make sure you stick to it).  Make sure you are in a right attitude yourself. Lose the temptation of grounding them for life attitude.  Teach them to do as you do.

You can teach them as early as two that they are ‘asking’ for consequences by their choices.  If they are acting out they choose to be punished.  Do not let them blame you.  Encourage them to choose wisely and receive good consequences.

I hear mom’s say, “he/she’s in their terrible two’s” or, “oh, he/she’s carried the terrible two’s into the terrifying three’s”.  Don’t CLAIM it for goodness sake.  Do something about it.  You do not let children control you or your home.

I know I have said it under other sections, but let me say it again.  Parenting is a SMALL minuscule picture on earth of our Heavenly Father’s relationship with us.  Remember what happens when you try to control your life; you try to control God?  Makes a mess of things doesn’t it?  Well, why are you allowing children to control you and the home?    I see toddlers in control of large adults 4x’s their size and I shake my head and think, “when did you hand them the keys?”  Most turn over control before they are two believe it or not.

I won’t mention which daughter, but one of mine wanted something in the checkout line and I said, “no”.  To which I received a tantrum, her first.  I looked at her and told her she was embarrassing herself and me and that was no way to behave in a store.  I told her to make a decision or I would have to embarrass her.  She continued to scream.  So I dropped to the floor and threw a tantrum.  She was mortified.  She told me I was ‘mbearinsing her’.   I told her I would stop if she did.  Quit laughing, it worked.  We were in Winn Dixie and a mom looked at me and said, “Oh, if I only had the courage to do that.”  There were no more tantrums in the store.  There are those that say not to humiliate your child in public.  HOGWASH! (<~ I have become my mom, it was her fav word).  Half of what is wrong with children is we are protecting them from good child rearing techniques for fear of what others will say or think.  Or worse, what some ‘professional in the world’ says will hurt the child.  The world is not in charge of raising your child.  The truth is, you answer only to God for how you turn out your kids.  Any child still living at home and you pay the bills, is your responsibility, your stewardship under God’s eyes.  I am sorry to say that an out of control teenager did not wake up that way one morning.  It started years before when someone stopped parenting and handed over the keys. It is very hard, but not impossible, to get those keys back and start over.  God expects you do to just that. With a preteen or teen you start with a heart to heart of how it should have been and how it wil be going forward  if you have to take away a lot it is hard  just keep reminding them their choices decide the consequences

God gave a manual on teaching attitudes to yourself as well as your children.  These are simple Bible truths that Jesus taught in Matthew 5. (This is greatly simplified due to BLOG constraints – everyone should really do a thorough study of God’s attitudes TO BE.)

  • 3“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (our BEatitude is recognizing we OWE all to God) God is teaching us and we need to teach children, that we are blessed by Him and stewards of all that we have; we should have a humble and thankful spirit and not a proud and greedy one
  • 4“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted” (our BEatitude of SORROW  for sin that brings repentance, recognizing when we do wrong and REALLY being sorry) God is teaching us, and we need to teach children, that we should be sorrowful over sin and wrong doing; that we are dependent on the Holy Spirit to walk daily in Him and that we cannot do so without Him. Teach them to yield to that conscience; yield to the tugging of the Holy Spirit.  We know when we are doing wrong and we know when we are ignoring that tugging on our conscience.  If we ignore, the Holy Spirit within us grieves.  We ignore that, we harden.
  • 5“Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth” (our BEatitude of  SUBMISSION to God) God is teaching us, and we should teach our children,  to be quiet and rest in Him, to not get upset when we are wronged but to turn the other cheek and show His love to others as He has shown it to us.  We are to be patient with others as God is with us, that includes being patient with the children you are teaching patience!
  • 6“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled” (our BEatitude is one of SENSING our need for God and striving to be more like Him) God is teaching us, and we should teach our children, through two things the human body can understand, hunger and thirst.  These needs keep us alive and our hunger and thirst for righteousness are vital to our spiritual life just as food and water are to our physical body.  Priorities must be set and followed.  Putting God first makes everything else fall in line.
  • 7“Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy” (Our BEatitude is one of SHOWING Christ in our actions) God is teaching us that when we hunger and thirst after Him, our ACTIONS will show Him.  This is our testimony in action.  We show love for others as He has loved us.  For a long description of LOVE see my “For The Greatest Of These is Love” post.  We give forgiveness as we are forgiven.  We show compassion, pity, patience, just as we have been shown them by Him.
  • 8“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God” (Our BEatitude is one of seeking His Holiness) God is teaching us, and we should teach our children,  to put away the world and seek only that which is pure.  God cannot look on iniquity so having it in our heart separates us from Him.  To see God, we must have a pure heart.  Pure hearts come from what we put in our minds through our eyes and ears.
  • 9“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God” (Our BEatitude is one of SOLVING not creating problems) God is teaching us, and we should teach our children, to strive to get along and find good in others and situations.  To establish Peace through Him.  Our light in a dark world should bring comfort and peace.  As the old saying goes, “if you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem.”  When actions display God in us and not us in the world, then we are part of the solution.
  • 10“Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven”(Our BEatitude is one of SELFLESSNESS) God is teaching us, and we should teach our children, that when we take on all of these BEatitudes, the world will not understand.  Sometimes you will be walked over, made fun of and some will even give their lives.  This is hard for us as adults and certainly not something little children can grasp.  We simple must teach them that sometimes, even though we are doing right, bad things are going to happen; people are going to hurt us.  This is when it is even more important TO BE the BEatitudes through His strength in us.
  • 11“Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me”(Our BEatitude is one of STEADFASTNESS standing strong in the Power of the Blood).  In America today, Christians are being picked apart and ridiculed.  You and children will face more and more verbal, if not physical, persecution for standing in the testimony of Christ. During these times our resolve may weaken, or we may become apathetic if we do not stand in His Power.  There are times when I just get quiet and pray, “Lord, by the Power of the Blood, for the Victory that HAS BEEN ONE, I bind satan from this situation.  What is bound on earth is bound in Heaven. (Matthew 16:18)  I claim this VICTORY.”  And then I move in His Power, not my own.

Learn the BEatitudes and pass them on to your children.  What’s your BEatitude today?

Renee’ Green                            Copyright 2012
RBGreenDesigns 2020

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” O be careful little mouth what you say…”


 
O be careful little mouth what you say
O be careful little mouth what you say
There’s a Father up above

Pretty is as pretty does

And He’s looking down in love
So, be careful little mouth what you say
 

I was walking in the parking lot and I heard the most profane comments, including the Lord’s name linked to profanity.  The voice was young.  I stopped and turned around.  Three girls and a boy were  walking behind me; none over 15 years of age.  I looked at the girl with profanity flying off her lips and wanted to tell her how pretty she was … until she opened her mouth.  Her words made her ugly.  Not cool, cute or popular.  They made her ugly.  You can dress up like a princess all day long, but one flow of inappropriate words will destroy that image.

The woman pushing the cart in front of me was on her phone talking loudly.  “Now this is between just you and me.  But, she ….”.   Really?  There were about ten others in earshot listening to her gossip.  If she had been quietly shopping others would have thought her to be a diligent mom out shopping to feed her family.  Her words made her a gossip and she spewed hurt and shame on an unsuspecting audience that may or may not know her victim.

I hear so many words coming out of mouths that grieve the spirit within me.  Parents to children; children to other children.  People lying, calling others names.  Gossiping, half-truths … words, words, words.    I think Christians need to be very cautious in this area and not fall into the world’s standard of speech.  God’s word has a lot to say about our words:
James 1:19 
“Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;”

James 1:26
“Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless.”

James 3:6
“The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.”  (You should read all of James 3:1-9).

Ephesians 4:29 
“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”

God expects us as parents to make sure our children hear the correct things to say.   The shows, video games, computer games that they watch, influence their speech.  In our house I did not allow my girls to call each other stupid, idiot, jerk or other demeaning terms.  We do not say shut up.  Speech is important to developing a Godly character.  Sadly, some parents think it is not anything to worry about.  However, speech is a sign of respect.  God thinks a lot about the words we say.  The verses above are only a sampling of how He wants us to guard our speech.

If we are not guarding our speech then we are not guarding their speech; we are not guarding their minds.  If we are not guarding their minds, we are not guarding their souls.   What they think to say becomes their speech.  Their speech reflects in their actions, their actions in their character.  It all starts with a word … then more words.

“O be careful little mouth what you say …”

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♪♫♫♪TRADITIONS! ♪♫TRADITIONS!♫♪♪♫


Ahhh…Mother’s Day!  Brings back so many memories.  Raised in the South meant following traditions.

Happy Mother's Day!

On Mother’s Day all five of us would go out to the rose bushes and select a red rose.  My brothers would get buds and my sister and I would pick open blooms.  Mother would select a white rose for herself and a white bud for my father.   You wore a red rose to honor your mother who was alive, and a white one for a mother in Heaven.  You simply would not go to church on Mother’s Day without a rose on your shoulder to honor your mother any more than you would go to church without your gloves and hat on Easter.  In fact, many (including my mother) would take extras roses and pins for those who did not have roses in their yards.  Flowers and their colors were non-verbal traditions of deep beliefs.  The practice was carried out on Father’s Day, at funerals and of course  in weddings.  It was a way of saying what you could not necessarily say to everyone.

My youngest daughter was married 18 months ago and I made all the silk flowers.  The grandmothers had two white roses to symbolize the two families they were bringing into the union of their grandchildren.   The groom’s mother wore a corsage of two red roses, symbolic of the two grandmothers she and her husband represented.  I wore a corsage of one white rose and one red rose since my mother is in Heaven and Phil’s mother is alive.  No one ever wore black to weddings as that was a symbol of rejection of the bride or groom’s choice in life mate.  Guests could simply look at flowers and know that grandmothers and mothers were alive even if they were unable to attend; and that by the attire of all those present in the family, that it was a happy and accepted union.

Symbolism … traditions.  Things we pass on as a heritage to our children.  Unfortunately, many points of traditions and heritage are being scoffed at in modern times and legacies are disappearing.   All the world went gaga over a royal wedding of a couple that had lived together for two years and were already  married in God’s eyes.  The girl wore a white dress and full veil, a slap to the meaning of purity they have stood for all these years.   The last royal wedding was not sanctioned until the bride-to-be proved her purity.   Yet so many Christians got caught up in the fan-fare and glamor of a royal wedding, missing the sad part of how they desecrated marriage and the church.   The church sold out the sanctity of marriage for the sake of royalty.  With so little value placed on marriage is it any wonder that motherhood and the value of an unborn child’s life is also devalued.  The morality level of the world slips each time Christians get caught up in the world’s ways.

Sadly, Spiritual traditions are fading with this trend and children are not the spiritual legacies of their former generations.  Grandmothers are not bouncing children on their knees singing to them songs like,  “Only A Boy Named David”, or “Build Your House Upon A Rock”.    Everyone’s lost time for what matters.    So many feel we have to ‘keep up with the times’ which leaves little time for traditions of Spiritual guidance.  In reality, the times have not changed.  There is nothing new under Heaven.  God has not changed.

The scriptures have not changed:

Deuteronomy 5:16 “‘Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD your God commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may go well with you in the land that the LORD your God is giving you.”

Ephesians 6:1 “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.”Colossians 3:20 “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.”

God’s Word sets the standard for the traditions that lead to a legacy in Christ.   Honor your parents … honor your mother.  Your children are watching to see if you honor your parents.  They will treat and honor you as they see you treat and honor your parents.  Create a legacy in your children by being your parents legacy. 

♪♫♫♪TRADITIONS! ♪♫TRADITIONS!♫♪♪♫

I hope each of you gave your Mother’s a great Mother’s Day if she’s alive and that you were given one by your children in turn.

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“Shackled by a heavy burden…”


Matthew 11:28-30  “Come to Me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  29 All of you, take up My yoke and learn from Me, because I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for yourselves. 30For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” 

We've all had days like this ...

There are so many ‘clichés’ Christians use when going through hard times.  We tie them to scripture, halfheartedly believing them with our heads and not our hearts.  We sing songs like, He Touched Me … buy books, plaques and bookmarks to encourage… all are well and good.  Somehow though, we don’t get to the heart of the matter.   None of these make the burdens go away.  Just because He is carrying the load, the problem, the burdens … it does not mean they are gone.  It means you are trusting Him with your entire life, good and bad and waiting on His time.  The ill may be  healed on earth, but they will be healed in Heaven.  That crisis will resolve, in His time and in His way.  That job will come, in His time … in His way.

God did not let Abraham sacrifice Isaac, but He did allow him to place his son on the altar and raise the knife.  God took Abraham to the brink.  Why?   Abraham knew God is sovereign and faithful; he trusted God.  Sometimes  we go down to the altar kickin’ and screamin’.  Oh if we would only say …

2 Timothy 2:12 “…for I know whom I have believed and I am convinced that He is able to guard what I have entrusted to Him until that day.”

Sounds like the beginnings of another good song.  We allow ourselves to believe with our heads and not walk with our hearts as well.  We are shackled because we talk the talk and do not walk the walk.  All clichés we speak.  Some of us are like, “that’s my burden … and I’m stickin’ to it!”  Some wear their ‘thorn in the flesh’ like a badge of honor,  almost as though they are ‘proud to suffer’ for Him.

The truth is, if we could solve our own problems we probably would not seek Him.  The deeper the problems the more we SHOULD seek Him?  Actually, we should seek Him everyday in every way.  But, being the humans we are … sometimes we need to go to the ‘brink’ for no other reason than He wants to take us to another level of trust.

The way Abraham reacted to where God was taking him taught Isaac truths about God.  Since Isaac was not kicking and screaming, I surmise that Abraham had long since been teaching Isaac to trust God no matter the circumstances.  What do our children see when we are asked by God to do a difficult thing or go through a difficult time? Are you shackled?

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Doing what’s right. Right?


Parents try to raise their children to do the right thing.  They say things like, “because it’s the right thing to do”, or “we want to make it right” … “we want to do the right thing don’t we?”   And sometimes even, “two wrongs don’t make it right!”.

Right. Right?

The Bible says in Romans 3:10 (ESV) “as it is written: “None is righteous, no, not one;”

Doing the right thing will NOT necessarily make you or your child right in God’s eyes. 

Ephesians 2:8-9

8 For by grace are you saved through faith, and this is not from yourselves; it is God’s gift—

9 not from works, so that no one can boast

That does not mean that just because your child and you are saved that you stop doing the right thing.  Salvation is not a license to do as you please and your children need to hear you say that.  You never quit trying to do the right thing just because you’re ‘safe’.   Remind them that God’s word says:

James 2:17

Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone.

There are those that think if they ‘make it right’, either by man’s law or society’s rules, then they are making it right with God.  Make sure your children are taught by you what the Bible says about right and wrong, about making it right with God and others.  Broke a law?  Did the time, paid the fine?  You still have to go to God and make it right and maybe those that were harmed by your actions.  Do not fall into the world’s views and traps of “it’s OK, you tried to do the right thing.”  Doing the ‘right thing’ will not automatically make you right with God.  Paying man’s ‘dues’, fulfilling man’s laws, does not make you right with God.  That is why we read His word and learn what He has to say about every aspect of our lives: Mental, Emotional, Physical and Spiritual.  Do not take the ‘hearsay’ of the world on any issue.  Dig into His word and find out for yourself.

You want to be RIGHT with God, not ‘right’ in the eyes of the world.