Nobody’s Business


No Body's Business

What Are You Telling Your World?

Once a week we try to go to the beach to enjoy peace and quiet and unwind a little.  We choose a beach that is ‘smoke free’, has a life-guard (keeps the noise down of wild partying) and one that has great fishing and shelling.  Yesterday when we arrived there were less than 1/2 dozen people on the beach.  We settled in about 10 feet from shoreline for the view.  The birds were singing, waves lapping and a nice gentle breeze had the trees whispering.  That lasted maybe an hour before a woman settled in between us and the shore.  I never have understood why when there is a whole couple of football fields of beach to choose from, people set right down on top of you.  She not only was blocking the view, but she proceeded to light up (smoke free beach) which meant we had to ask her to put it out.  The signs are everywhere, however, we are the bad guys?   Then her friends showed up to give her some beers.  They did not stay long so she was left with her beer and nothing to do with her hands but use the cell phone.  She  pulled out her cell phone and began to talk and drink her beer.  The more she drank the louder she became.  The beach had added a few more families by this time but, she did not mind her conversations or language around these small children.  Her business became everyone’s as we had no choice but to listen to all her personal calls to her friends.  I do not understand why people forget that when they are in public talking on their phone, others are listening, even if they do not want to.  Her first call began with her congratulating her friend on being added to the list of  ‘his exes’.   Evidently children were involved because she continued to tell her to explain to them they were a ‘dysfunctional family’.   The details she exposed us all to were unbelievable.  She continued down her list of friends to call and went over a myriad of soap opera scenarios.  This woman was probably in her late 50’s or early 60’s.  You would think she would know better than to ‘air the dirty linen’ as our generation was supposedly taught.  I am sure I will be accused of stereotyping, but you can just see this woman in her living room with her beers, cigarettes and tabloids while watching her soaps.  All of these reference materials make her highly qualified to be handing out advice it seems.

There is a time and place to discuss situations and none of those involve strangers.  Talk shows and yellow journalism have done away with any sense of discretion.  They have coined phrases to use as crutches like “dysfunctional” and “ex”.  The generation being raised in the shadows of all these public disclosures are being so conditioned and desensitized to sinful lives that they are not going to know sin when it slaps them.  God says we are to guard our speech and our minds.  (Colossians 3:2Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.”) As parents we need to teach our children as we raise them about guarding their minds and their speech so that when they are grown it will be automatic.   We have become a world of gossiping and everyone believes they have the right to know each others business as well as share theirs.   The Bible says in Matthew 12:35-37, 35 The good person out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure brings forth evil. 36I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, 37for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”

What ‘business’ are you sharing?

One Step At A Time …


I have fond memories of Bill Weston and his father whom we all called “Dad Weston” coming to our church on various occasions while I was growing up.  If memory serves me correct, they worked with the early years of Youth For Christ.  They taught us a song, that I believe they wrote.  I have not been able to find it anywhere but, it went something like this:

One Step At A Time
Only One Step At A Time
That Is The Way The Lord Will Lead You
One Step At A Time

Take That One Step Carefully
Take That One Step Prayerfully
For That Is The Way The Lord Will Lead You
One Step At A Time

Just a simple child’s song, but it has stayed with me my whole life.  Amazing how God brings it to mind during troubled times. 

Psalm 119:11 says, “I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.” 

Children should be taught the word of the Lord.  By memorizing verses as well as through song.  Most of us raised in the church remember little songs like, “Only A Boy Named David”, “I Will Make You Fishers of Men”, “This Little Light of Mine” and others.  Simple truths taught through simple children’s songs.  The mind, like the body, needs to be filled with healthy food.  Philippians 4:8 says, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”

We are what we think on ...

What Goes In

  • What we read, see and hear become our thoughts and what we think on (Video Games, TV, Movies, Books)
  • Our thoughts become our attitudes
  • Our attitudes become our character and
  • Our character becomes our actions (Proverbs 16:3 “Commit your actions to the LORD, and your plans will succeed.”)

Do not allow ‘junk food’ to enter your child’s mind.  Watch what they see, hear and read.

Renee’ Green Copyright 2010

RBGreenDesigns 2020

Got Time?


Make Time For Family!

Family that plays together ...

Today I watched several families at church interact and it brought to mind several years ago when my husband and I went out to dinner to celebrate my birthday.   We had a great view of the ocean in a quiet corner.  There was soft music, candlelight, and good food, everything conducive to paying attention to each other.  Shortly after sitting down a family of seven was seated nearby consisting of two grand-parents, two parents and three children.  The youngest was small enough to need a booster seat and the middle child was about 9 or 10 years old.  The oldest was probably 14 or 15 years old.  Everyone was barely in their seats before all the electronics were pulled out.  The smallest had a portable DVD player with ear phones and was watching the latest Barbie movie.  The middle child, a boy, pulled out a hand-held video game player and was furiously working his thumbs.  The oldest girl had her cell phone out and was texting away.  I watched off and on throughout the dinner.  The children were quiet, it was true, but with three generations sitting together there was no interaction among the different family members.  It was clear that electronics had long been the babysitter, their parent and best friend.

Dinner time.  Brings back so many memories doesn’t it?  You gathered every night at the table, everyone talking at once.  Stories of the day at school, a meeting or work.  Fellowship, camaraderie, socializing … just being a family.   Some of my fondest memories are reunions and church gatherings with plenty of food and places to sit and talk.   But then came the gadgets, the electronics that made our lives simpler so we could spend more time together.  Right?  Sadly, it has not turned out that way.   We have lost the ability to communicate and function.   No one can function without their electronics.  We live and breathe by them.  If we have a power failure we will not know what to do.

The term dysfunctional family is tossed around like seeds to the ground hoping they will take root and grow into something.  The truth is that we need to make our families function again as God intended.  It saddens me to see families ‘together’ without being together.  We are going to have to take action.   Somewhere the keys of control were handed over to the children to the point that no control reaches them.  They all function autonomously.  I doubt that you will be the most popular parent when you take the reins and slow things down.  You must start by taking back the controls so that you can function again as a family.  Saying ‘no’ is harder than allowing them to go their merry way.

I believe that by allowing them to run their lives free of control, parents are setting an example for their spiritual life as well.  There is a place for control in everyone’s life.  We all need to control ourselves, self discipline is so important to turning over our lives to the Lord.  You cannot be successful in a  friendship, relationship, or family until you are successful in your relationship with Christ.   You will have to bring everything to a full STOP.  Control cannot be taken over at 100 miles an hour without a wreck.  STOP.  Look to the Bible and see what God says.  “Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10) and ” Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger (James 1:19), are good verses to apply in handing over the reins to God.  Children need to be trained from early on about control, boundaries and self discipline.  For those who started late you simply have to start small with your children.  You will have to teach them control, self discipline and applying the truths of the Word in their life through the example of your own life.

In thinking about meal time I have decided to start another page solely for meals.  My daughters call me from time to time for recipes and hints about shopping and cooking.  So notice my new tab “What’s For Dinner” and let me know what you think!

I Get No Respect


I actually had a student tell me recently that I had to earn their respect and that it was not automatic.  When I asked if their parents had taught them that, they said no and added that their parents also had to earn their respect.  Of course I asked them if that was what they wanted from me; to have to earn my respect?  The student continued the discussion with comments like, “just because you are an adult doesn’t mean I have to respect you”.  Of course these ideas are coming from everywhere, the media, movies, video games, TV … they all are filled with youth that have no regard for authority, position and have little, if any sense, of decorum.  Much is learned from parents as well, who show little respect to others.  It is the ‘do as I say do, not as I do’ syndrome.

The Bible mentions the word  ‘respect’ and/or ‘honor’, in several forms.  All are signs of character and/or because of good character.  These are  traits we want to teach our children.

RESPECT:

  • Leviticus 19:3  ‘Each of you must respect his mother and father, and you must observe my Sabbaths.  I am the LORD your God.’
  • Leviticus 19:32 ‘Rise in the presence of the aged, show respect for the elderly and revere your God. I am the LORD.’
  • Exodus 20:12  ‘Honor your father and your mother, so that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.’
  • Ephesians 6:1 ‘Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.’

HONOR:

  • Receiving honor: ex. birthright – Exodus 4:22; Psalms 89:27; Jeremiah 31:9; Romans 8:29; Colossians 1:15
  • Showing honor: ex. diligence in what you do Proverbs 12:24;22:29
  • Place of honor: ex. at the right hand – Psalms 45:9; Psalms 80:17 ; 2 Chronicles 24:16,25; 21:2
  • Position of honor: ex. placed in a position to honor – 2 Kings 25:27-30; Jeremiah 52:31-35
  • Act in honor: ex. actions of honorable men and women – Acts 17:10-21
  • Dishonoring: ex. Not honored among peers – Matthew 13:57; Luke 4:24-27; John 4:44
  • Honor to the elders: ex. honoring the aged – Job 32:6,7

Respect and honor, both are important to the Lord.  You must show Him respect (another blog), then your parents (no age limit here – they are always your parents), and then others.  Many of the Beatitudes relate to respect … they are ‘attitudes to be’.  Do as you say do, your children are watching.

But, I want it NOW!


It is no secret that we are earnestly praying for Phil a job.  For 19 months we have prayed, and prayed and prayed.  I was raised by a praying mom.  My girls were raised with prayer is the answer to all of life’s problems.  You would think I would have learned all there is to know about praying by now.  But, something occurred to me today.   Something I want to teach my girls (even though they are grown).  I was checking in with my sister in KY via a phone call and during the conversation she reminded me of the following story.

The little boy asked his mother to buy the used bike from the guy down the street.  He wanted a bike really bad.  He kept nagging and nagging his mom for that bike, until one day she gave in and bought him the used bike.  The next day she went to the sporting goods store and canceled the new bike she had on lay-a-way for his birthday.  He could not wait and had forfeited a new bike for a used one just so he could have it when he wanted it. Sometimes, like the little boy, we pray for things and we want them NOW.  We do not know what wonderful thing God has in store for us if we will wait on His timing; so we beg and nag until we get something less than His best.  It does not matter that what we receive is also good, it is that it is not His best.

So, we are thanking God for His daily provisions.  We have no clue what the future will bring or where our provisions will come from.  Although we are still praying while looking for jobs (God expects us to put action to our faith), we are praying differently.  Now we are thanking Him for His daily provisions, asking Him for the faith and patience to wait on His timing, and thanking Him for the perfect plan and perfect job that is going to unfold in His perfect time.   We are not going to whine and demand until we have settled for something less.

Psalm 5

1 Give ear to my words, O LORD,
consider my sighing.

2 Listen to my cry for help,
my King and my God,
for to you I pray.

3 In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice;
in the morning I lay my requests before you
and wait in expectation.